The Best Way To Build Your Confidence

babysteps“Even the smallest step towards your goal is PROGRESS.” This statement is true in almost all cases.

I was on a coaching call as Joyce was explaining to me all of her goals for the upcoming year. She was quite excited as most people are in January as the New Years resolutions are quite a ritual in today’s world. I asked Joyce if she had set goals before and she said yes, but wasn’t too successful in the past. I asked her why.

There was a pause and then she bluntly said, “Well to be honest, I have lacked the confidence to do them.”

I questioned her, “Why is this year going to be any different?”

She said, “because I have a coach now! Right back at you, Coach Bob.”

Well then, with that attitude we got right to work.  I reviewed Joyce’s goals and most of them were unrealistic plus for most of them the bar was set way to high. Many people set goals too high and struggle with them right out of the gate,  and then they get discouraged and quit way too soon. If you don’t believe me, ” how long do January packed fitness studios stay crowded? ( 3 weeks)? Maybe less?

I introduced Joyce to the Zorro Circle as noted in the book, The Happiness Advantage. This is were we make a circle of all the things she can currently do. Then in the circle she is to focus on just these and inch the circle out slightly each week, so we can stretch her belief system at a reasonable rate.  For example, if she ran 2 miles this week, and then ran 2.2 miles next week. Essentially this is a form of training on how to channel our efforts on small, manageable goals, to gain the leverage to gradually conquer bigger and bigger ones.

Even the smallest steps are still wins, regardless of what anyone says. You need to have some wins to gain confidence. When we stretch the circle we keep growing the circle and the confidence grows. That’s how you gain confidence .

Time to make your circle?



Bob Molle (Coach Bob)

Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable