Ever Had To Start Over Again?

Greatest DirectionHave you ever felt like your life is spinning out of control? Well, life is full of unpredictability. At the drop of a hat, disaster can strike. Everyone encounters heartbreak, illnesses, job instability, and financial crisis. Perhaps a personal situation that arises and then knocks you down.

This reminds me of a meeting I had about this very topic. I met with Jim and as I looked across the table at him, he struggled to lift his head to look at me.

I asked Jim, “Can you tell me a little about yourself?” He lifted his head slowly and said, “Bob, the whole plan I had just went up in flames”. Continue reading

The Happiness Formula

19354-Famous+happy+quotes+happiness+When I am traveling and get delayed for a little while in a city, one of my favourite things to do is get a bike and go exploring around the trails.  This actually just happened on a recent trip!  The other day while I was exploring on my bicycle I stopped to rest for a minute pulling to the side of a river bed. I noticed a man sitting on a bench staring out at the beautiful day and I said, “Hi”. To my surprise, he fired back a very energetic, “Hello!”.  I was actually totally surprised by his energy. Continue reading

Take Your First Step

TAKE THAT FIRST STEPI had known Sue for a number of years and one morning she approached me with a concern she had with growing her business.

“Bob!” Sue gasped, “I have this plan of adding a cooking piece to my business!” (she already had a well-established fitness business.)

I gleamed back at her and said, “Sounds exciting, when is the date for the big launch?”

Her eyes glanced downward towards the floor in remorse and then she sheepishly explained to me that this idea had been lingering in her head for a couple of years now.

I softly asked, “What is holding you back Sue?”

She looked at me for a quick second and said, “What happens if it’s doesn’t work Bob?”

This is what many are scared of…fear of failure… Continue reading

The # 1 regret people have on their death bed, make sure it not yours!

I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

Do-what-you-loveI was in a change room at gym the other day and happened to recognize the person beside me that I haven’t seen for quite some time.

Jim was in his late fifties, but very fit. We started chatting first about workouts, and what was working, then he paused for second and said, “Bob, what do you you do for a living?”

“I know you coached football in the community before.”

I briefly explained that I still coach, but that I work with companies to coach and facilitate teams on how to grow their business and personal one on one coaching as well.

To my surprise, Jim looked back at me and said, “I can tell you love what you do!”

I replied, “Why did you say that Jim?” He said , “As long as I have known you always have a smile on your face. You always seem happy.”

Jim then went on to discuss he had just buried a long time friend a few weeks ago and that really woke him up. He said, “I really need to do something I love to do!”

I looked at Jim sarcastically and said, “Want some good news? You can…”

Unfortunately most people don’t put a plan in place to do this. I refer to this a Passenger or Pilot?

Do you allow other people to tell you where and what to do? Or Do you take control of the steering wheel and drive the direction you want to go?

It is still a choice.

Cheers,

Bob Molle (Coach Bob)

Never be offended to give out a big hug!

cuba friendI recently traveled to Cuba and was anxious to see what changes if any had happened since my last visit of close to 30 years ago. It is not as easy to get a realistic feel to the culture when you return to a resort like atmosphere in Varadero.

In my past days, when I was visiting as an athlete, it was not uncommon for a jackhammer or backhoe to start up around midnight right in front of your hotel (just to help you sleep the night before a big competition).

The good side of Cuba is that many of the people are well educated and the healthcare is very well respected. The down side is that a well educated teacher would make around 300 Cuban Pesos a month. ( yes, this is at par with the U.S. Dollar)

During my travels I ran into a old Cuban national team wrestler who happened to work at the resort we were at as a cook.   One day while he was a cooking at the resort he recognized me way back in the crowd of people. (Now picture this) He then stopped cooking and started screaming and waving at me ( I did not make a lot of friends as there was a huge line up of people awaiting their meal). I ran around the back side of the kitchen to give him a huge hug and then picked him up over my shoulder. Yes, not a usual greeting unless you were a wrestler. He beamed like 100 watt bulb for the next couple of minutes then kindly asked me if he could talk to me at the end of his shift. I agreed and he asked if we could meet daily. We did and I would always start with a big hug, then practiced my spanish chatting with him. The glow on his face was priceless.

Is it time for you to give someone a big hug? The after effect is priceless and well worth the effort!

Cheers,

Bob

Making ‘ME’ a habit?

time for me concept clock closeupI was recently on a call with Susan and she started describing all the tasks that she had to do for the week and quite frankly, she was overwhelmed, to say the least. Her daily list was enough to raise her blood pressure to a boiling point.

“Bob”, she said, “I very seldom have time to fit any personal items in my day, and I am exhausted by the end of the day. Work, cooking, cleaning and kids activities is just the tip of the iceberg.”

I hear very similar comments over and over again. Yes, the daily demand of tasks can be very overwhelming and if it continues at this rate you will end up 40 pounds overweight, unhealthy, and trust me not very happy.

Learn to take whatever time you need for yourself first thing in the morning (if possible).

Dedicate at least 30min to 1 hour to yourself (yes you deserve it) and take care of your physical and mental needs your body requires.  This needs to be habit forming and a ritual you should do daily.

The truth is that when we take time for ourselves to pursue our passions, do the things that we enjoy, relax or even do nothing at all, we end up happier, healthier and feeling better. “Me” time allows us to de-stress, unwind and rejuvenate. Taking time for yourself allows you to renew, heal, and be more energetic.

When I have asked my clients why they don’t plan more “me” time in their schedules, three common themes arise: feeling guilty, not enough time, or it feels selfish.

“Me” time is not something you should feel guilty about. It’s nothing more than taking some time to put aside your everyday business and treating yourself to an activity that you enjoy. And when you do that, you can come back to your responsibilities with greater focus, commitment and enjoyment.

Time to make “Me” your first priority?

Cheers,

Bob Molle

What is your #1 priority? The majority have it wrong.

The New Year is all about new beginnings, a fresh start and the chance to hit the ‘reset’ button after a season of indulging. So, it’s not surprising that January starts with so much enthusiasm as New Year resolutions are getting heated up. Many feel the need to set some pretty lofty goals. The thing is, only a tiny number of resolution makers actually achieve them.

I’m still confused why most people wait until the New Year to start these up?

Well, let’s not go there right now.

Regardless of when you hit the ‘reset’ button it is important to set reasonable and achievable goals.

Let’s focus on what should be on the top of your list!

The most common answer I get from people around the globe is “Bob, my # 1 priority is my family”

Sorry, this is the wrong answer! Think about it for a minute.

I appreciate the nurturing part, especially all the moms out there, but let me ask you a couple questions to clarify this.

Ever see an obese set of parents walking down the street?
What do their kids usually look like? Yes you know the answer.

The #1 priority should be YOU! Body, Mind, Spirit.

Plus, your kids mimic what you do. YOU set the example for everyone.

If you lack self-confidence, what will you children be like?
If you don’t exercise, what message do you send?
If you are short-tempered, how will they react when faced with a challenge?

The best thing you can do is be a good example for your loved ones.
Again, think about it. If you’re sick, you are actually a burden on your family.

We need to change the order of this. Is it time for YOU to change your priorities?

Take care of number #1, so you can take care of #2 priority and so on.

YOU should always be first priority.

Cheers,

Bob Molle

How much is too much?

Ever come home at the end of the day to only face another laundry list of items you had to finish by the evenings end? There is not enough hours in the day!

 

Susan was no different, she had two children, worked outside the home and her husband had travelled quite frequently for his work.

 

One night while talking to Susan I asked her to itemize all the things she had on her agenda that week. I was blown away with what she has on her plate. I asked Susan if she was happy, there was a long pause…..
Susan replied, “At times I am Bob”, reluctantly forcing something positive out.

 

Susan was a bright lady who was on a number of volunteer boards in her community, and on top of that she was a manager of her daughter’s soccer team and manager of her son’s hockey team. She did such a good job on all these tasks she would be frequently asked time and time again. Susan would sheepishly accept the position year in and year out.

 

In a recent conversation Susan had revealed her health had declined and her body weight had popped up an uncomfortable 20 pounds. She wanted to change, but where would she find the time?
We assembled all of her agenda items and then I asked her to prioritize all of them, yes all of them??

 

Then we made starting eliminating the duties at the bottom of the list one after the other,
I simply asked Susan, “Why do you put all these duties on your plate?”
She replied, “I just don’t want to let anyone down, so I never say no.”
Time to get uncomfortable and realize it okay to “say no” to requests, your first priority is you!

 

Being happy has a huge effect on your family, your friends, and everyone that comes in contact with you. Time to GCBU, and realizing it is okay to say no to some requests.

Cheers Bob

Finding Your Passion!

 

Have you been ever   been offered an amazing opportunity, but it didn’t quite feel right or it   wasn’t what you were truly passionate about? Did you go through with it   because you felt obligated or decline and move along?

 

Let me introduce you   to Carol. She was going through this very situation. I had met with Carol   several times before, and there was one huge elephant in the room that she   never addressed. How could she address it? She was just about to take over   her Dad’s company that had cashflowed for years! It was his baby! How could   she tell her Dad that she found the company quite boring? Carol had the   ultimate dilemma. Should she assume total control of her Dad’s company and   continue to run it as he had done for years and not mention a word? Or move   on and do what excites her?

 

Boredom!   I don’t recommend it for a second! You should do what excites you.

 

It was   always the plan for Carol to take over the business. Her Dad had planned this   for years.
It was the perfect plan, wasn’t it? Once Carol took hold of all the roles and   responsibilities of the business it was clear she wasn’t going to be happy.

 

It was a   good business, making good money, just assume all of dad’s roles, right?   Wrong! Carol found it very monotonous and had really no passion to run the   family business. What was she going to say to Dad? She had to tell him. Yes,   that was going to be a challenging talk, but she knew her passion was in   marketing. The constant change of new ideas brought a smile to Carol’s face   as she talked about it. Carol looked at me and she knew in her heart she had   to tell her Dad!

 

Yes, you   will make decisions in your life that may piss people off, but isn’t your   first priority for you to be happy, and not someone else’s version of happy?

 

Learn to   tell people when their idea is not a fit for you. If they don’t get over the   rejection, they were never in support of your best interests anyways.

 

Yes, you   heard it before! Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable or the short version   GCBU!

 

Should   your overall goal to be happy? Is it time to let some people know your   passion?
Time to GCBU?

 

Cheers,

Bob

 

Push or Pull? Your Choice….

Pull the string, and it will follow wherever you wish. Push it, and it will go nowhere at all. ~Dwight D. Eisenhower

 

At a recent speaking event a business manager questioned me about his about problems with employees who did not listen to him and who were not living up to his expectations. He was growing tired of trying to push them to improve their performance. This is a problem I hear time and time again. People complain about their employees, their children and sometimes even their spouse or partner.

 

When I hear these complaints, I ask one simple question: Do you like being told what to do? When I asked the crowd at this particular event, they grew silent. In that silence lies the simple truth…that no one likes being told what to do. As the well know quote says: [h]e that complies against his will is of his own opinion still. ~Samuel Butler (1612-1680), in Hudibras.

 

So what is the answer?

 

Instead of pushing, change the focus and pull information from them. How do they perceive their performance and how would they like to make an improvement? What do they love to do? What do they want? What are their goals, dreams, and aspirations? How can you help them to get there?

 

Helping someone achieve his or her goals enables you form a partnership with them. More to the point, when you help others achieve their goals you will be well on your way to achieving yours.

 

It’s time to Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable.

 

Cheers,

Bob Molle

 

Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable
www.bobmolle.com